I don’t really know why, but I’ve been in a really funky or odd mood of late. I’m just restless and frustrated with…absolutely nothing. I haven’t the slightest clue what’s wrong, but I’m just in a really goofy mood, and I’m slightly annoyed with it.

I think it’s just the downer coming off of a very stressful situation over the last few months, and now that things look like the ink is drying and we’re good to go, it doesn’t really change that feeling, ya know?

Thanks to wonderful stuff like FitDay, I can track all sorts of information that I normally would have lost interest in tracking…and according to FitDay’s information, I have finally broken through 1,000 calories burned via exercise in one day(based on my age, weight, and activity level).  It took a pretty monumental effort to knock this out, and I wasn’t really trying to do so.  Today’s exercise basically consisted of 30 minutes of exercise with Emily, and an hour on the stationary bike.  I also did 10 minutes of walking to break up the monotony of being on the bike.

Yay me!

So as of Friday morning, I am exactly 100 pounds heavier than the weight at which I played my last high school football game 13 years ago.  down 110 pounds.  While my long-term goal weight is still a ways away, it’s cool to step back and realize milestones for what they are once in a while…

Eager to see what the near future brings for several reasons.

So if any of you know me, you will know that Mexican food (at least the deep fried cheese-covered concoctions that pass themselves off as “Mexican” food in most of America) has a special place in my heart. And what’s not to love – I mean it’s deep fried and then covered in cheese. You could cook the devil’s pitchfork that way and it would probably be both devoid of nutrition and functionally yummy. What some of you may not know (and it’s something I just learned), is that Mexican fare also has a special place in my stomach – right near the fire alarm – it turns out.

The wife and I headed out to eat at the local fried queso palace up the road, and after coming home, I have spent at least three hours with the chicken fajita nachos pulling the fire alarm regularly.

So, the next time that in my smug dumbness I say, “Hey hon, can we eat Mexican for dinner tonight?” Will someone please just drive to Tennessee, and slap the taste right out of my mouth?

Mexican has now become Mexican’t, so if you don’t mind, I think I will go to grieve the loss of the spot in my heart that’s being replaced by common sense and zantac at the moment.

So I’m not sure where I should start with all of this…the reason for the delay from my last post to this one has less to do with what I’ve been doing from an exercise or weight loss perspective and more to do with being consumed with finding a new job.  That’s the nature of things, I suppose, when you work with technology in a down economy, but I was laid off (along with a pretty large group of other people) from my job in November.  Having been in the recovery phase of having pneumonia when I received the news, I think it was just a lot to stomach.  After some searching of myself, asking the questions that I believe everyone asks after being told they have no job (what am I going to do, what do I want to do, for whom do I want to do it, etc.), I have finally come out on the other side.  With that said, I had to make some decisions as to what was most important to me, and finding a job and keeping up with my attempts at healthy eating and working out pretty much took the forefront, and the blog…well it got lost in the proverbial shuffle for that window of time.

As to where I’m at today, I am still eating healthy (although some trips out to eat and the lure of the Mexican joint up the street got the better of me some days) and I am still exercising at least three (and sometimes 4 and 5) days a week.  My goal right now…my buzzword for the next few months…is “consistency.”  I want to get consistent with my workouts, without it becoming monotonous.

As for results, I suppose I owe it to my faithful reader (no, you read that right…reader) to share where I’m at as of today:

Weight:  I currently weigh 354 pounds.  A net loss of 106 from the start of my working out and healthy eating.  My body took a pause on me…after jettisoning 100 pounds, I spent the last month at what amounts to a stall or a standstill from a weight loss perspective.  That said, my body was changing around on me even though I wasn’t losing weight, so I suppose that is a good thing.  I figured at some point my body would have to take a breather and just sort of play catchup.  What I noticed is that my resting pulse rate, my BP, etc…they all got much better during this period of time. My long-term goal is somewhere between 210 and 220, so I’ve still got a ways to go, but hey…I’m just about at a halfway point with this, and it will be interesting to see how the rest of it goes.  I will point out how weird it will be to say, “I weigh less than the weight I lost,” if I do, in fact, reach the 220 mark.

Body Changes:  Well, we only started tracking my “inches lost” three months ago, so the figures below are from my last three:

Chest:  59.5″ –> 56.25″

Waist:  55″ –> 51″

Hip:  67″ –> 59″

Right Biceps:  16.5″ –> 16″

So in the past three months, I have lost 15.75″ from my body.  I don’t have the figures from before that, but this ought to give a pretty good idea of where I’ve gone.

Anyhow…back to the grind…well grind if we define grind as making a sandwich and some pretzels for lunch.  After that, I’m getting a haircut and then washing my hair (I can’t stand loose hair on me…drives me crazy!).  Hopefully very soon I will be (once again) gainfully employed, and my days can have more functional value — and financial value.  Until then, however, I am determined to continue working hard, continue to work towards improving myself, and to spend time asking myself the deep questions of life (like “do I want chicken breast or turkey breast meat for lunch”). 

Check back soon…now that I’m got some light at the end of the tunnel, I’m back to the blog, and hopefully you’ll see lots of new and exciting updates from me in the future.

Godbless.

Tyler.

So updates first, then my rant.  I’m down 90 pounds as of this week.  That’s great of course.  But the means through which I have reached that point aren’t necessarily something I would recommend to anyone.

On Tuesday, as you know if you read my previous post – I went to the little clinic thing to get checked out.  Nada – just said to come back later.  On Thursday, I went to a different clinic, who sent me to urgentcare/readicare/somethingcare – and they did a chest x-ray and found out I have pneumonia in my right lung.

Let me tell you how much I hate being sick (and how much my being sick makes other people hate being around me!). 

I have to take medication until the 19th of this month, I go back and see the doctorlady on the 23rd, and hopefully can be released to hit the gym (and my life again) with a vengeance. 

It is going to be a challenge to get back any of the cardio and muscle strength that I have lost during this episode.  That’s the funny thing about pneumonia.  I don’t feel all that sick…I can still do anything I want, it’s just that climbing the stairs makes me winded and lifting anything has me dripping sweat if I don’t watch it.  There are times when I just can’t seem to catch my breath. 

All that said, I suppose I was looking for another challenge – a nice short term goal – so let’s see how long it takes me until I’m back where I was.

So I have – well, something.  The people at the “get well clinic” at the CVS said, “well, we don’t know what it is, but we know you’re not sick enough to give you anything.”  As if my coming up there at 7:20pm when they closed in 10 minutes was because I wanted confirmation of something.  Grrr.  Either way, I taught the Bible study at church yesterday – when I started I had a 100.5 degree fever, and after taking two Alieve it broke about the time I began class (7:10 or so).  So we’ll see how this plays out.  I missed my workout for the first time since I have worked out with She Who Shall Not Be Named (setting aside Denver and that whole fiasco!).  We rescheduled for this morning, and I’m going to have to let her know that I am cancelling, call the “get well clinic” and then, hopefully, actually get pills get well. 

All that said, this morning’s weight was 374.4, meaning that I have passed by a smaller milestone of having lost 85 pounds gone.  I have lost 85.6 pounds, and I have only 14.4 to reach 100 pounds lost.  That, to me, is a nice goal.  In retrospect, if someone had said to me – hey, if you work out, you can be down to 360 by the end of 4 1/2 months, I would look at them and say – you’re fully of it.  But between my diet and exercise, I look like I may very well reach that goal, God willing.

That brings me to another quick point I want to make.  It’s something I intend on speaking about this Sunday, but that is the joy that we have lost from our collective worship experience in the modern church.  And it is my contention that we lost that joy (and of course I’m speaking in generalities) because we lack a fundamental understanding or appreciation for just how deadly sin is.  That is, we undervalue both the cost and the reason for Jesus on the cross – it’s become yet another trite word picture in our church – akin to saying “I know Jesus” when the Bible clearly indicates that Jesus must know US (check out Matthew’s transcription of the Sermon on the Mount – Ch. 5, 6, & 7).  No, I’m not trying to browbeat people, and I’m not trying t0 make anyone feel bad.  I’m simply suggesting that like Paul, Peter, and so many others have suggested – that we test ourselves, check ourselves by our fruits, and ask ourselves - am I really joyful.  Do I truly understand the depth of my depravity outside of Christ, and left alone to my sinful lusts and devices?  Because it is my assertion that if you don’t have the latter, you’ll never truly have the former. 

Just my two cents.  Probably not the forum on a life change blog to talk about Jesus, but you know what:

1.  I have the password.

2.  I make the rules.

3.  It’s never the wrong time to share about Jesus and His teachings.

Godbless,

Tyler.

No, no, no…not a physical like a bend over and cough physical. That would just be – well awkward to share on here.

I’m talking about the physical results from a quick assessment by She Who Shall Not Be Named (and made me hurt today from my workout!).

On 10/12 and then 11/9, I had the following measurement differences:

Chest: 59.5″ down to 59″ (down .5″)
Waist: 55″ down to 53.5″ (down 1.5″)
Hips: 67″ down to 64″ (down 3″)
Right Biceps: 16.5″ (no change)

I figured my merry band of followers would like to know.

I have been aweful at keeping things updated here…sorry.

My current weight is 380.6, or 79.4 pounds down.  The past week and a couple of days, I’ve been in the closest thing to a stall that I have experienced thus far.  I lost about 2.2 pounds over the course of 8 days, but the trouble is that at least mathematically, I should have lost at least 3.5-4.  It’s not a huge issue, 2.2 pounds is still 2.2 pounds, but I have had to accept the reality that I will probably not reach my 350 goal by 12/3/09.  I can, however, be below 350 by Christmas – if I can average 4 pounds a week from now until then. 

So I’m making that my new goal.  Goals are nothing if not flexible and adjustable. 

As a side note, I am going to begin to work some light jogging into my walks, and on that matter, I am going to begin walking again.  I haven’t been doing much walking since my knees had been giving me issues, so I had switched to biking as a cardio workout.  I’ve now been at this since 7/13/09, basically 3 months and two weeks.  That’s 22.85 pounds per month.  Rediculous, I know.  Amazing what hard work and behavioral changes can cause. 

I will say that it’s interesting to say, “Yay, I’m down 80 pounds!”  Then, in the same breath, say, “now only 180 pounds to go.”  It’s a little deflating, I will admit that.  I suppose, however, that it’s a lot less hard to say than when I was looking around and thinking “Wow, I have 260 pounds to lose…”

A few thoughts from me late tonight because I can’t sleep…

I get asked a lot lately – how do you do it!?  Or what made you decide to change?! 

First, I think it’s exceptionally funny that as Americans, or maybe just as people, we’re programmed to look for cause and effect.  I had a heart attack, so therefore I eat less cholesterol and salt…something like that.  (No, I didn’t have a heart attack!)  The truth is there were a hundred reasons why I decided that now was the right time and the right reason to get busy doing this.  Many of them are personal things which would bore you to tears, but more public reasons have to do with my freedom, my happiness, and my life…I was truly becoming a prisoner inside of myself, my attitude was terrible, and my life was quickly becoming something that I didn’t control.  I am a control freak, I admit that.  I work on it…but I do believe that we’re to be in control of ourselves, and I had lost that someplace.  Some series of issues – the things we commonly call “life” happened (I truly wish I could pin them down for you, but they are faded and leave only their resultant scars, not fresh memories), and I became who I am.  I have heard the expression “where you are today is the sum total of all of the decisions you have made to this point” and I firmly believe that.  We are truly 10% what happens and 90% how we deal with it sort of people in today’s world. 

Now, to the people who ask me how I’ve been able to do it, there are a couple of answers.  My family – wife, parents, close friends, etc. have all been very supportive.  That has been a huge bonus for me – not having someone in my ear telling me I’m going to fail.  Additionally, I have a wonderful trainer who knows how to motivate me.  (and no, not through cookies…I know that’s what you’re thinking!)  Lastly, I think that I just reached a point where I said it’s either this or death.  Either be entombed in this body or make a lifestyle change, and the answer was pretty obvious.

Now, I want to address something that will probably seem pretty harsh.  While I don’t mean to be rude, I just feel that after responding to this tactfully about twelve times in the last few months, that I just want to address it.  That is the people who say, “Wow…well I’d give anything to be able to do that…”  Here goes (you may want to strap in)…

No you wouldn’t.  You wouldn’t give anything or you would lay down the doughnuts.  You wouldn’t give anything or you would stop feeling sorry for yourself.  You wouldn’t give anything because all you want to give yourself is a pass in life and excuses as to why you’ve reached the same point I did…you don’t like something about yourself, but you’re unwilling to make the changes required to alter your circumstances.  If you would truly give anything, you would be in the gym with me biking, walking, running…exercising.  If you would truly give anything, you would pay for each pound lost with the sweat that I have, and you would lay down excuses and cookies in exchange for victory after victory.  To these people, it’s about making a decision and then having the fortitude to stand by it…what I’m doing isn’t rocket science…it’s basic math.  Calories Eaten-Calories Burned = Net Weight Gain/Loss. 

If you want to lose weight, either eat less, eat better, exercise more, or just admit that it’s either not the right time or the right place, or whatever.  I know of several people who have done this before me, and some who are doing this after me, and I’m sure I will learn about more…but they all share a common trait…they got tired of the status quo and made changes which altered it. 

There is nothing I am doing which is beyond your ability.  There is nothing I am doing which is beyond the realm of possibility for you.  There is nothing I am doing which does not serve a single-minded goal of becoming healthier. 

You can do the same things I have if you so desire.  You can be successful at a lifestyle change that improves your life - be it in your career, your health, your relationships, etc. Ultimately, however, the first move is yours.  No one can make you want it badly enough to go out when it’s raining to get a walk in, or go in when your whole body hurts and hop back on the bike.  Nobody is going to push you because they are busy either pushing themselves of making their own excuses. 

The Navy SeALs have an expression that says, “there’s no hill for a climber.”  I firmly believe this.  Become the change you want to see – if it’s weight loss, eat healthier and exercise more.  If something in your life isn’t working, implement the change and watch as those barriers or those issues fall to the wayside.

But don’t, please don’t, confuse things.  You are responsible for you, and you are nothing more than the sum of your choices…don’t say “I wish” or “I would give anything” because the truth is you haven’t yet, or you would already be on the road instead of the sidelines. 

Sorry if this was mean, but I think it needs to be said; not from a place of judgment but a place of honest self-evaluation and a willingness to say something very honest.